Catch-up

It's been s few months since I wrote anything. We all finished well in Ukraine. The last weekend was a little crazy. A few of is even jumped off a bridge. On my way back to shore my shoes were stolen. I ended up going home the same day everyone else did, only on a different flight, so I was actually earlier than them.
Since we've been home our little group hasn't kept in touch very well. I guess everyone has just gotten back to their lives. I miss them, though. A few of us got together to go to Meagan's wedding. Jamie got married to her missionary, and her reception was the same day as Meagan's. We managed to see them both, even though one was in Idaho and the other was in Salt Lake City. It was good to see them again.
The summer flew by really fast. I went to Vernal for a week to stay with my sister and help her with her son who was born prematurely while I was in Ukraine. He was still on oxygen while I was there. Now he's as healthy as any baby could be. I visited the grave of my grandmother who passed away while I was gone. I wish I could have seen her again and said goodbye, but in the end there are no real goodbyes anyway. I'm sure that I'll see her again. I helped my little brother get his motorcycle running and used that to get around until I could get my car fixed. Now the motorcycle is having problems again.
I got a job with my old friend Casey at a new junior high school that they built while I was on my mission. It was a lot of fun working with him, and the schedule is easy and flexible enough that I can keep it and still have time to do all my schoolwork. In the summer I did all kinds of different jobs around the school, but now that school has started I mostly just clean the bathrooms. I can't say I really enjoy it that much, but it is symbolic for me to make something so dirty spotless every day. Then the next day it's filthy again and needs to be clean. I reminds me of our lives.
A lot of things have happened with my friends while I was gone. Casey is planning on marrying his girlfriend in April. Kyle got married not long after I got back from Ukraine, and now he has a job working with me, too. Kristy had her baby a few weeks ago. I still haven't had a chance to see him yet, but I'm proud of her. I was able to spend a little time with Deb before she went to California and then to England. I've seen Allen once since I got home, but only because his wife was out of town. I've done a few things with the missionaries I served with, but not a lot. Hopefully I'll get my social life going a little more now that I'm working less. For a few weeks I was doing two jobs.
I'm shooting for staight "A"s this semester. I need it to improve my GPA, and I want to prove to myself that I can do it. I've had a rough time in some classes, though. In history they just happen to have a quiz every single time I show up late, and the teacher doesn't consider accidents on the freeway or road construction to be valid excuses to take them late. In math I accidently mixed up my book with an older edition that I had, and did all the wrong homework. Hopefully I'll find ways to make up the points that I've lost.
I have a second on-call job playing laser tag. It's an easy, fun job. I mostly just help with equipment and sometimes I go out and shoot at people to make the game more interesting. I get to be a referee sometimes, too, which just means I take a really big gun and shoot cheaters from far away.
So, that's the last few months in a page. I could go on for a long time about everything, but that would be boring even to me. My goal now is to just do well in school and become an optometrist. I feel very alone, though. I'm sure it's my fault for the most part. I can see now that I wasn't really raised in our common culture. I spent all my time with my family and don't really know how society expects me to act. As a result I'm a little weird and hard to understand. I've been trying to learn to speak in a way that isn't to confusing, but it's taking time. Everything that I say seems to have two meanings, and I usually have one in mind but everyone else understands the other. That is how I'm different. So, school is my main priority, but I'm also looking for a friend who is patient enough to learn to understand me.

Flat Broke

The whole group seems a little confused when we try to get together now that Meagan is gone. We never know where we're going or what the plan is. I think it's kind of funny. We've done some fun things as a group, though. We went to the beach last Saturday and everyone got a little sunburnt. Chelsea and Jordanae brought a stray puppy with them that we all played with a little. The branch had some treats after the meetings as a way to say goodbye, even though we've still got two Sundays left.
I was actually planning on staying an extra two weeks, but the last time that I went to withdraw money from my debit card, I noticed that it wasn't in my wallet anymore. After looking everywhere I wrote home and had my parents cancel it. Now I won't have enough money to survive for an extra two weeks, so I've been trying to get the office to reschedule my flight to the original time. So far I haven't heard back from them, though. I told my mom to go start nagging them for me. That should get them working on it.
The end is coming up really quick. Only seven more days and we're done teaching, then we'll head home the next monday. Or at least hopefully I'll be heading home with everyone else.

Bye Meagan

The first week after our vacation was a pretty rough one for me. For the first time we had 100% attendance. The kids were all excited to be back together and because of the good whether and all the other stuff that makes kids excited. It was pretty hectic in class, most of the time. Since then things have calmed down a lot.
Other than the crazy kids, the week was memorable because it was our head teacher's last. We had a lot of activities that made it fun, but I was a little sad the whole time because this is the beginning of the end. Everything has been so different from how I thought it would be, but I'll be sad to go home.
The weekend was great. We had a party Friday night with a fireworks show. You can buy huge rocket racks here that would be way illegal in the US for cheap. On Saturday we had a picnic at Pirehova, a place just out of town where old Ukrainian architecture has been brought and reassembled. It was a lot of fun. On Thursday Meagan gave us all awards and notes. She is one of the most thoughtful people I know. I got the "Father Duck" award. The title comes from a time in Prague when I was feeding the ducks and got ten of them to gather around me. I pointed out to Whitney that I had as many ducks as girls, and she said I should start calling the girls my ducks. It stuck for me.
Meagan left from the airport early Monday morning. I walked her home Sunday night because I'm always afraid terrible things will happen at the most ironic times. Nothing happened, though. The little hug goodbye reminded me how deprived I am, and then I walked home in the dark thinking how much I'll miss Meagan. She's always so excited and happy, even when she doesn't really want to be. She does it for other people. She's someone I can really look up to.
Now another week is almost over. It has definitely been different without Meagan around, but things have gone as normal. I'm starting to get excited for the semester to end myself, even though it looks like I'll be spending my extra two weeks touring Ukraine instead of Russia. I still don't have an invitation to visit, so I still have no visa, and I don't think there's time to get one. I'll be able to visit some other time, though, I'm sure.
Well, tomorrow is another day of teaching. There aren't many left.

A Good Rest

In the end I think it's a good thing I stayed in Kyiv for my vacation after all. Now that it's over and I've heard stories from the other two trips, I have to say that I'd have like to have been there to help them, but if I had been than I'd be more tired than if I would have taught double shifts all week. They had some crazy things happen that I wish I could have prevented, though.
Some of the highlights of my vacation were seeing my old mission president, Elder Pieper, and talking to him and his wife, taking the teachers from Moscow for a walk around town, having sleepovers and movie nights, riding a Ferris wheel in the WWII memorial park, throwing up some hamburgers, and starting a blood feud with Deidre. I would go into more detail on all of those things, but I think it's a lot more interesting for you if I just leave it up to your imaginations, and I don't have a lot of time. It was a great vacation though. The best part was probably just laying out in the sun on the one warm day we had, or getting caught in a sudden wind storm. I love wind storms. So , now I'm back to work.

An Apostle of the Lamb

I had a great opportunity over the past weekend to go and hear Elder Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve speak at a stake conference. The conference was two sessions. The first was held in the regular chapel on Saturday evening, and the second in a rented hall on Sunday morning. I thought that they were both being held in the rented hall, so I didn't actually make it to the first session. But the second session was more than I could have hoped for, anyway.
Elder Holland is a very powerful speaker. At the end of his talk he had every member in the audience promise themselves to never leave the church, and I'm sure they all complied. He talked about how President Hinckley has surely already earned his salvation, but instead of retiring to Florida and golfing he just keeps on working. President Hinckley doesn't need it. He doesn't need to do anything else for himself. He probably could have quit a while ago. But he goes on and will continue to work as long as he has strength. He does this for the next generation, because he loves us. Elder Holland told us the members here, most of whom are first-generation, to think of their children. He challenged them to go on and stay active in the church, even if they don't have the strength, so that their children will have the strength. If they can just hang in their until the end then their children will have everything. They'll have a temple, a stake, young men and young women programs. But only if the members now give it to them. So even if we aren't strong enough to do it for ourselves, we all need to keep at it for the next generation. We can give them the strength that we ourselves don't have.
Elder Holland emphasized the power that the Holy Ghost can have in our lives if we are worthy and strive to obey. He said that members of the church take this incredible gift for granted. It is the right to the companionship of a Member of the Godhead. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ will probably never visit us personally in this life, but we still can have the company of a God. This is a wonderful and sacred privelage that is available only to members of this church and can only be gotten in one way. He urged us to do nothing to lose the Spirit, and that it will be our greatest protection. It is a personal gift from the Godhead that can be gotten in no other way.
At the end of his talk Elder Holland pronounced a blessing upon all the members of the congregation. I will always remember the part that applied to me as a priesthood holder. Before pronouncing the blessing he explained to the congregation that it was no different than as if he had laid his hands on all our heads individually and blessed us by name. I believe him.
I am more convinced than ever that the men we sustain as prophets, seers, and revelators really are who and what they claim to be. I have felt the effect of that blessing upon me and know that it was pronounced by one having authority. I know that if I do my part then it will be fulfilled entirely. I am grateful for the prophets and apostles of our time and all they do for the church and it's people. Let's listen to their words and not take them for granted.

Stowaway

I've got a pretty great story to tell now. So, the break I was looking forward to for so long is finally here. Our group has split into three. Four girls have gone to Austria, three have gone to Yalta, and I am staying in Kyiv with the last three. This happened two nights ago, and I've been to tired to post it until now.
I was with the group going to Austria as they walked to the train station. Their train was due to leave at 11:50 and it was about 11:15 when we got there. It was about then that Janae realized that she had forgotten her camera battery charger at her house. There was no way to go get it in time, but Meagan's house was pretty close, so we decided I could try to run there and get Meagan's camera and charger. Then Janae could just put her card into Meagan's camera.
I ran up the hill and back without any trouble at all. Okay, maybe I had shin splints and was completely winded when I got back, but the point is that I made it. Unfortunately, while I was gone Janae, who'd been feeling sick that night, threw up a little on the floor. When I got there some guys were mopping it up. She said she'd be alright to go anyway, and so I carried her bag for her onto the train. That's a normal thing for gentlemen to do here, as long as they get of when the conductor shouts for the escorts to leave.
It just so happened that the girls ended up in the same wagon as a man who I will never understand. He was walking up and down the halls shouting profanities at anything that got in his way. I don't know if he was drunk or on crack or both, but he was out of control, and I happened to be one of those things in his way. He rudely shoved his way past me and I calmly let him know how I felt about that. That led to a long tide of curses from him, but I didn't back down. Eventually he walked away and the girls pulled me into their room to keep anything else from happening. They think I'm pretty stupid for acting like that sometimes.
I was wishing them luck and telling them how sorry I was that they were stuck within hearing range of that maniac, who was still shouting up and down the hall, when Meagan asked me if I'd noticed that the train was moving. I guess the conductor called for the escorts to leave while I was getting an earful from the psycho, so I didn't hear him. I ran to the door as fast as I could and tried to open it when the conductor stopped me and asked what I was doing. I told him that I wasn't supposed to be in the train and needed to get off. He told me I'd have to wait for the next stop. It was two hours away. I went and told the girls that I was a stowaway and Janae told me I should have jumped off. I decided she meant it in a good way.
The good thing is that those two hours gave me time to clear up a few more dilemmas. Janae was going to be in a room apart from the other, but I asked someone to switch her tickets and he politely agreed. Then I helped the girls make their beds and explained to the conductor that Janae was sick but that she and the other girls would take care of it themselves.
There was a really nice guy in the room next to the girls' who said he'd look out for them if anything happened before he got off on his stop. He let me use his cell phone to call Tanya, our director. I had time to say I was on a train to Austria before I wsa cut off. He also told me that the stop they were going to kick me out on was really dangerous and that I should probably just bribe the conductor and go farther so I could get of on his stop and then he'd help me get back. I told him that I'd think about it, but I was pretty sure that I could take care of myself. I actually wouldn't have had to bribe the conductors. I had a nice talk with them and they would have let me go all the way to Austria for free if I would have had my passport.
When we got to the stop I jumped off the train and ran to the ticket office. I got a ticket back for 9 hrivyas (about two dollars) and caught the train back immediately after. It took three hours to get back, so it was about 5:00 am when I got to Kyiv. I decided I deserved some McDonald's before heading home.
The metro still wasn't running, so I changed my course and headed to the head teacher's apartment. The girls who stayed in Kyiv were sleeping there and after ringing about a hundred times I woke Diedre up. She let me in (I was worried she would think it was a joke and not open the door) and I staggered in and fell on the floor. I told her that I had a story to tell her in the morning and fell asleep.
I've heard from Meagan and she says things are going fine, but I'm still worried. She'd say things were fine if they were being held hostage by an insane gunman. But, I'm sure they'll take care of themselves. And now I've got yet another random story to bore my friends with.

Ready for a Break

I've been sleeping really well this last week, and I decided not to ruin it by waking up in the middle of the night and posting something on my blog. Nothing really interesting happened during the week. Lessons went well for the most part. There was one case where a little girl managed to launch herself from a chair and ride on my back while I was putting things away. It was also a little difficult teach the older group. They have been a little rude lately.
There is a week off school for all the Ukrainian kids starting now. I'm going to be staying in Kyiv the whole time, but there is still plenty here to do and explore. I'm looking forward to the break. My host-family is going out of town, too, so I will be staying in the head teachers apartment while she is on vacation to Austria. I'm looking forward to sleeping on a good bed. My back hurts a lot today.
We had an activity that Elder Holland was invited to, but he didn't end up actually making it. Someone who had seen him earlier said that he looked really tired. I might get to meet him tomorrow. I'm going to go say "hi" to Elder Pieper, my former mission president, and maybe he'll introduce me to Elder Holland.
Thanks for the comments on my posts. I love hearing back from everyone. I'll definitely try the more conservative treatment for my toenail. I'm not afraid of needles, but I'm not up to injecting myself. I think it is getting better because it is pretty close to coming all the way out. I do pull the edge of the nail up over the skin sometimes in an attempt to get it back to normal, so all I need to do is stuff something in there next time.
It's getting really warm here. I might spend some time laying out by the river this next week. It should be a great break.

Little Toe, Big Ouch

The weekend was great, and I needed it. The bed I sleep on was bought by the school for the family that hosts me, and it's about as cheap as a bed can get. I can feel the wooden beams straight through the mattress, and ever since one of them broke I haven't had on good night of sleep. On weekends I like to go to the head teachers apartment and take a nap on her couch. It helps me catch back up.
Friday evening after teaching we had our movie night as planned. I thought that if I would vote for shows the girls might like then I could have a better chance of not sleeping through anything too sappy, and we actually ended up turning on both the movies I recommended, for a while at least. First we "The Princess Bride", and then we started "the Scarlet Pimpernel". I had the support of the Black family on both of those choices as well. Most of the girls started chatting before we turned on the second film, however, and after ten minutes decided that they'd better turn on a cartoon since they'd lost focus almost completely, and we ended up watching "the Incredibles".
Saturday was my day to relax. The head teacher said she'd call in th morning if there were any plans, so I stayed home and waited and just laid in bed. When the morning was mostly over I decided that I'd call her instead. We ended up getting a group together and heading to the Chernobyl museum. It's one of the most interesting museums I've been to. I got a headache that made me wonder if all the objects have been thouroughly decontaminated. The entrance of the museum is decorated with the signs of all the cities and towns that became uninhabitable due to the accident. Then there is a large collection of objects recovered from the site or used to control the fire. After that there is a collection of modern art that relates to the disaster. It's a pretty impressive display. Some things that stood out to me were a couple of prayer books and a biography of the saints with an icon, all taken from the site. I believe anyone who strives to obey the Lord is a saint, and I believe prayers should be our own words from our hearts, but I also can appreciate written prayers as inspirational poetry. I also don't agree with the use of icons in prayer, but can admire them as paintings. What really made the display have meaning, in my opinion, was realizing that at the time of the Chernobyl disaster it was illegal to own religious materials. No matter what the opposition, honest people will always strive towards that God who created them. It is part of our nature that He put in us.
Another display that caught my eye was a plaque from firefighters in the United States presented in honor of the firefighters who died shortly after the accident from exposure to so much radiation. They called them brothers, which is a very meaningful term, especially considering how much the United States and Soviet Union mistrusted eachother.
On our way back home we stumbled onto a chocolate fair hosted by Milka. Could you get any more lucky?
After getting back to the apartment I took my nap, we watched a movie, and I went home around midnight. Before I fell asleep my host-mom came into the room and asked if I could look at her computer the next day and solve a problem she was having with it. It was only typing in English and not Russian. I said I'd try in the evening, but wasn't sure exactly what the problem might be. She said it was alright if I couldn't fix it. She would just have to buy a new one on credit. After she closed the door my host brother told me to pretend to try to fix it and leave it broken so he could have a new computer to play with. I know that his family is in a difficult financial situation, and was completely intent on doing everything I could to save them from another burden. So, the next evening when I got home I took a look at the computer and with a little luck resolved the problem. My host-brother hasn't even looked at me since then. He even insisted on sleeping in the other room. His parents were grateful, though, and I'm sure he'll get over it.
I went to church Sunday morning. We have a very friendly branch here. After the meetings we had a little potluck and I got to have a rare and much appreciated American meal. Most of the branch members work for the U.S. embassy, and are provided with more American supplies than I can ever find.
After we'd all had our fill I took eight of my ten to go find the site where our church will soon build a temple. Surprisingly, I took us straight to it. It is a lot right next to a new stake center, which was dedicated yesterday by Elder Holland, who is still in town. The girls couldn't resist laying out on the beautiful green grass of the stake center. We sang hymns for a while and then went inside to look around. It looks just like the American equivalent on the outside and the inside, and feels the same, too. I think it made everyone a little homesick.
So, the new week has started. After this one ends we'll have a week-long break and then four weeks to go before heading home. It sure has gone by fast.
One thing I could mention before posting this is my big toe on my right foot. I lost the nail in a motorcycle accident last summer, and it finally grew back after I came to Kiev. The only problem is that some skin grew in the way first, and the two came together to make a very painful ingrown. It has been bothering me for months, but I'm afraid of what a Ukranian doctor might do, so I keep trying to take care of it myself until I get home. It's been getting better, but today I had some bad luck with it. I was walking from the dry-cleaner to my school when I banged it pretty hard on a piece of rebar hooking up from the ground. I could feel it bleeding after that. Then on my way home from school in the evening I took a detour through an incredible park by my house. After a delightful walk I came out the other end and saw a big granite block lying in the road. It wasn't positioned in a way to block traffic, so I assumed it wasn't put there intentionally, but it still seemed like it might be a danger to cars coming around the corner. I decided a good outlet of my excess energy would be to roll it out of the way. I started rolling it, but the block was long and rectangular, and when I got it up on the corner the right side slid over and came right down on my toe. I shoved it of pretty fast and walked away with a limp. This time I could feel the blood soaking my sock. My foot and calf cramped from the pain, and when I got home I went to bed early. I'd say it was the fifth most painful thing I've ever felt. But, I can only blame myself.

How did I get here?

I decided to make this blog because my older brother advised me to. I want to run a small business on the internet someday and he recommended that I start with a blog. I also need some way of keeping everyone posted on what's going on that is more efficient that personal e-mails and less intrusive than mass e-mails. This seems great to me because if anyone really wants to know what's happening they can come and check.

I'll tell a little about myself in case anyone I don't know reads this. I'm from Springville, Utah, a small, quiet, conservative city in a quiet, conservative state. My views on politics are simple: do what's right. How do we know what's right? Well, that's only as complicated as people have made it. Deep down everyone knows what's right but many convince themselves otherwise for various reasons or are convinced otherwise from childhood. If that is too vague then let me address some current issues. First, peace has a price and good men must pay it. If no one is willing then the good but cowardly majority will be enslaved by the greedy and selfish minority. It has been shown through history. Second, I had a loving mother and father, and I never regretted it. I think all kids should have the same.

That's enough for politics. As for religion, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I served two years as a full time missionary for my church in Russia, and I've never grown so much. I now speak Russian with adequate fluency, and have a good knowledge of the Holy Bible and Book of Mormon, both of which I still read daily and believe. One thing I want to mention about the Russian language is that it generally has no " 's" to show possession. In other words, you can't say "the dog's bone", instead you say "the bone of the dog". I bring that up to relate it to the name of my church. We are often referred to as "mormons", but as I said earlier, the official name is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. In Russian that is the exact same as saying Jesus Christ's Church of the Saints of the Latter Days. That alone displays our faith in Christ and our Christianity. If anyone wonders what the Latter-Day Saints means, it is added to distinguish Christs church in modern times from the one in ancient times.

So, I've introduced myself and covered some of my political and religious views. Now I'll tell some news and publish this. I've been in Ukraine for the last three months as a volunteer teaching English to young children. I will be here until the beginning of June, when I will hopefully leave to tour Russia and visit some friends there. I will return to American in the middle of June. I came to Kiev, Ukraine through International Language Programs (ILP). So far it has been a great experience.

I'm here with a group of ten other young students, all of whom happen to be female. Sometimes I do wish I had another guy to hang out with, but I'm used to spending a lot of time with girls because I have six sisters. I see the girls here as my sisters, too. There is a rule in ILP against romantic relationships, since those tend to bring nothing but drama and trouble to any group. That isn't to difficult for me, since I only know how to treat sisters, and haven't had any serious dating experience yet.

There are some riots going on downtown that I'm sure any American who watches the news knows more about than I do. The president dissolved parliament for not supporting him and they are trying to gather a political block to veto the presidents power or something like that. It is a lot like the orange revolution in 2004 only without any real spirit. There are crowds gathered waving their colors, but it's more like a party than a revolution.

So, today is Friday and I'm ready for a weekend. The girls and I are going to have a movie night with a friend who works for the embassy and is also a member of our church. He is also the teacher of the Institute of Religion in English. He stands out to me as a good role model, and I'd like to have a life similar to his in the future. I'm sure we'll end up watching some cheesy chick-flick, but at least I'll enjoy the pizza and the company.

As for why I came to Kiev in the first place, its something a cynic would mock. There are a lot of reasons, but none of them really matter but one. Sometimes in life you have moments of calm and clarity, where you know what choice to make and there is peace in your heart instead of doubt and uncertainty. That is the feeling that the Holy Ghost gives us if we are worthy and seek his help. That is why I came here, because, even though I don't know exactly what good it will do me or anyone else, I know that it is something good, and that it will be for the best.

I'll try to be more consistant with this journal than I have been with past ones. Typing is easier than writing, and I find that knowing someone might read this helps me right about things that are really important to me, instead of just venting passing emotions and later being embarrassed by what I've written.

We form our lives and our world. Nothing can affect our happiness unless we allow it to. One thing I am trying to always keep in mind is that I have the power to choose the right in spite of all opposition. That is the inheritance of a child of God. Life flys by so quickly. One minute I'm a child, the next I'm in Russia preaching the gospel, then I'm working night shifts at home, then I'm in Kiev teaching English. I don't know how I got here, but I know that the Lord has carried me, especially when I was weary.

So, 'til next time.